O Holy Shit, is more like it. Carson and I were on our way home after some last minute shopping with Nate. The three of us hit the mall today and had lunch before Nate headed to work. (Nate stayed downtown for the Illinois/Mizzou hoop game. ILL-INI!) This all seems harmless, right? Nope.
As I entered our subdivision, the Yukon started sliding. Mind you, our house is in the back of a heavily wooded subdivision and is a 30-minute walk from the front of the subdivision. How do I know this....pay attention. The roads were covered with an inch and a half of ice. Add to that very steep inclines, deep ravines, and f'ing gravel roads and you have a clusterfu*k. Staying in the car was not an option; neither was driving. I quickly realized I somehow had to get this cutie home.
I fed Carson a bottle, re-strapped him into his car seat, put on my gloves, shoved the formula I had just bought into my backpack and left the car. I stomped through muddy ditches in the pouring rain to the nearest neighbor's house (Barb and Dave) with Carson's car seat hanging from my arm. Here's where it gets good. Barb and Dave's house was on the opposite side of the street. Since the roads were so slick, I couldn't get myself and Carson to the other side of the street without falling. I put his car seat flat on the ice, held on for dear life and literally slid on my ass (and pushed Carson!) across the street like a baseball player would slide into second base. Yep - I had on jeans, flats, my pea coat and a cashmere scarf. F'ing great.
Bryan, the neighbor who lives closest to us, actually met us at Barb and Dave's and carried Carson to our house as I walked behind him in the rain. By 6p, Carson and I were safely home, though wet and cold.
Needless to say, the stars are brightly shining on me tonight. Thank goodness for nice neighbors!
1 comment:
You know I don't like a potty mouth, but I still had to read on. And, it just doesn't sound so bad coming from you and Nate!
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